The Behind scenes puppet-master pulling Obama's strings is-DAFFY DUCK!
By
HUMOR from blogger, Posted in Humor
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Daffy_Duck
(SATIRICAL PARODY STORY--RIDICULING THE ABSURDITY OF ALL
..................THE NWO HOAXING OF STAGED NEWS EVENTS)
VIEW THESE LINKS FIRST BEFORE READING THE STORY
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vanilla_Sky
http://www.daretoreadit.com/?id=40664
https://morestarsthanintheheavens.files.wordpress.com/2014/03/cary-grant-and-ingrid-bergman-in-notorious-1946.jpg
She felt the effects start to work on her. She felt dizzy, woozy. DID YOU SLIP SOMETHING INTO MY DRINK? she demanded.
Cary Grant smiled a devilish grin--YES MY DEAR I WANT TO KNOW WHERE THE TREASURE IS. WHERE IS IT HIDDEN?
Not only did she feel woozy, now she realized it was a definite mistake to agree to have a friendly meal with a movie icon of yesteryear. This guy was living in the 40's and caught up in some film noir mystery. He was nuts. She decided to try and remain calm, and talk in a slow even tone. CARY, THERE IS NO HIDDEN TREASURE. WE ARE NOT IN A MOVIE, IT IS THE YEAR 2015 and WE ARE JUST HAVING A SOCIABLE MEAL AND CHAT.
He chuckled..YEAH YEAH YEAH.... KEEP UP THE GOOD FRONT...DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT THOUGH...THESE SLIPPED Mickeys ALWAYS WORK AND IN A COUPLE MINUTES YOU'LL BE TELLING ME WHERE IT IS, YOU WON'T BE ABLE TO RESIST.
She took a deep breath...and kept an even calm tone...I HATE TO BREAK IT TO YOU BUT HIDDEN TREASURE WAS SO YESTERYEAR.... HERE in 2015 THE USA IS IN A DEPRESSION AND THE FEDERAL GOVERNMENT IS A GAZILLION QUINTILLION DOLLARS IN DEFICIT DEBT. ANY HIDDEN TREASURE HAS LONG AGO BEEN FOUND AND AND SPENT. THE AVERAGE FAMILY IS IN CREDIT CARD DEBIT UP TO THEIR EARS. THERE'S NO HIDDEN TREASURE TO FIND...ANYWHERE.
He looked at her quizzically ---WHAT IS "CREDIT CARD DEBT" --WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
Cary reached into his wallet.....OH YEAH LET ME CLEAR THE CHECK WHILE I'M WAITING FOR THE MICKEY TO FULLY KICK IN...He takes out four dollars...HERE THAT OUGHT TO COVER IT.
She sighed and realized this was a very mistaken caprice of adventure...CARY she said maintaining an even tone...FOUR DOLLARS WON'T EVEN COVER MY CUP OF TEA.....CARY ITS THE YEAR 2015. DICK CLARK IS NOT EVEN DOING NEW YEAR'S ROCKIN EVEN ANY MORE. ITS SOME GUY NAMED RYAN SEACREST. CARY, WAKE UP. COME AROUND.
Cary chuckled.....DON'T PUT ME ON LADY....I SAW THAT SCRIPT AND REJECTED IT.."VANILLA SKY"......STUPID MOVIE IDEA..I PITY THE SUCKER THAT SAYS YES TO IT...COME ON JUST TELL ME WHERE THE TREASURE IS.
She looked at him losing patience. I'LL TELL YOU WHAT --GET UP, GO TO A PHONE STORE -- GET A SMART PHONE ---AND AN HOUR AFTER YOU LEAVE I'LL TEXT YOU THE HIDDEN TREASURE LOCATION.
Cary stiffened his jaw. This gal was going to be a tough one. Smart alec talk. And she really has a will of resistance. He was now wishing he'd slipped two Mickeys into the drink. He doesn't have all day for this. And if he doesn't find the treasure location fast Dutch is going to be really mad. He decided to use his charm---------ALL RIGHT LISTEN I'M SORRY ABOUT THE MICKEY, BUT I'M IN A JAM. I OWE THIS GUY DUTCH A LOT OF MONEY FROM GAMBLING AND IF I DON'T GET THE TREASURE AND PAY IT OFF I'M UP A CREEK.
She thought for a moment and switched tactics. OK THEN..she said....I WILL TELL YOU....AND ITS GOING TO BE WEIRD ---- BUT HERE IS WHAT YOU HAVE TO DO.
Cary took out a pad and pen and listened carefully ready to take notes.
She went on -------- GET A CAB OUTSIDE...TELL HIM TO TAKE YOU TO "CNN" BUILDING AT LINCOLN CENTER.....GO INTO THE LOBBY THERE--SEE THE GUARD AND WHISPER IN HIS EAR---- "MY NAME IS CHARLIE HEBDO, I'M HERE TO GET THE MONEY. PLEASE SEND FOR ANDERSON COOPER. I'LL WAIT HERE IN THE LOBBY AND HAVE A CIGARETTE."---- THE GUARD KNOWS WHAT TO DO. HE WILL TAKE CARE OF YOU.
Cary wrote it all down. But wondered if he could trust her. Was she simply telling him what he wanted to hear to get rid of him? He looked at the instructions he'd just jotted. They were so bizarre he figured... this must be correct. He pushed his four dollars across the table, stood up and said ----THANKS LADY, SORRY ABOUT THE MICKEY...JUST WAIT HERE FOR A WHILE SO YOU DON'T GO WANDERING THE STREETS BEFORE IT WEARS OFF...I DON'T WANT ANYONE ELSE TO KNOW WHERE THE TREASURE IS
She nodded as he stood up. NO PROBLEM. YOU'VE GOT A DEAL.
She beckoned the waitress over and ordered some coffee. The waitress smiled at her and leaned over. WHAT A HANDSOME GUY THAT WAS WITH YOU. I SWEAR HE LOOKED JUST LIKE CARY GRANT.
She smiled back.--- I KNOW..... FUNNY ABOUT THAT, HUH?
Coffee was there in a moment...she sipped on it and felt better. Then she ginned a devilish grin. Wait till Cary gets to the CNN...... In his mind its still the 40's ---He has no idea..THERE's NOOOOOO SMOKING AT THE "CNN" LOBBY !!!!......He's gonna be in bigggggg trouble!
Suddenly she noticed a man walking in the front door...and step up to the hostess. A guy looking just like Tom Cruise.........The man nodded to the hostess and said ---HELLO.......I HAVE A RESERVATION....NAME IS CHARLIE HEBDO....
Simultaneously she heard an alarm clock buzz.... And someone whispering the words .....OPEN YOUR EYES !
OH DAMN! .....she said to herself. NOT AGAIN.....
A nanosecond later she felt a tap on her shoulder. She turned around. Cary Grant was there smiling warmly. He took off the sunglasses he'd had on......... HI --SO NICE TO MEET YOU. LETS GO IN AND SIT DOWN. I HEAR THE FOOD IS GREAT HERE.
YEAH....she said....WORD IS ---ITS A REAL FOUR DOLLAR TOP OF THE LINE PLACE
Suddenly the phone in her pocket rings. EXCUSE ME A MOMENT she says as she moves to answer. A gruff voice comes on ---THIS IS SECURITY AT THE CNN BUILDING. SOME WEIRDO IS HERE SAYING CRAZY THINGS AND HE HAD YOUR PHONE NUMBER IN HIS WALLET. DO YOU MIND EXPLAINING?
She smiles and whispers into the phone --OPEN YOUR EYES! .....She hangs up....takes Cary's arm and they stroll into the restaurant. As she eases into her seat she looks at the table directly across from them - and gives a wink to Tom Cruise. He's to the back of Cary so can only be seen by her. Tom Cruise spells out in sign language. ....WHATEVER YOU DO --DON'T TELL HIM WHERE THE TREASURE IS.
She nods. For crying out loud. What does he think .......that freakin' Cary Grant is going to get one over on her? She's been doing this a long time after all.
The waitress arrives and looks at Cary. --DO YOU FOLKS KNOW WHAT YOU'D LIKE?
Playfully he says... WE WANT TO GO ALL OUT----WHAT HAVE YOU GOT TODAY FOR FOUR DOLLARS?
FOUR DOLLARS? she laughs...and teasingly retorts...IF THAT'S YOUR BUDGET YOU BETTER GO OUT AND DIG UP SOME HIDDEN TREASURE THEN COME BACK!
They all belly laugh together.
The waitress looks to her now... she smiles cordially....... I'LL HAVE SOME WHITE WINE...AND DON'T SLIP ME A MICKEY
The waitress chuckles.
Cary chuckles too and grins at her playfully...... AW HOW DID YOU KNOW? MY PLAN IS FOILED NOW.
She touches his hand...... DON'T WORRY I'M SURE YOU'LL THINK OF SOMETHING ELSE
Tom Cruise overhears this even at a distance...He takes out his phone and dials up Dutch ....BOSS.... WE'VE GOT TROUBLE....I THINK THIS GAL IS PLAYING BOTH SIDES.
Dutch is instantly concerned but also calculating. He says to Tom--- ALL RIGHT THEN GET OUT OF THERE AND GET UP TO "CNN"...HEAD HIM OFF IF HE COMES. DON'T LET HIM GET TO THE TREASURE.
RIGHT BOSS! Tom clicks off and moves to get up--- but suddenly feels woozy and has to sit back down. OH GOSH he thinks to himself. -- Did somebody slip me a Mickey????
At the same time a skinny gray haired man walks in and steps up to the hostess....HI ....he says...I HAVE A RESERVATION. NAME IS CHARLIE HEBDO.
She eyes him quizzically..... DID ANYONE EVER TELL YOU ----YOU LOOK JUST LIKE ANDERSON COOPER?
Suddenly a SWAT TEAM of police descends upon the place and loudly demands to know if anybody's smoking.
Slumped in his seat Tom Cruise is still able to talk, and he calls out to the cops --NO ITS AT CNN.....GET UP TO CNN .. THE GUY SMOKING IS AT CNN...
Without a second thought [because thinking is so OUT in the USA today], reactively the cops dash out and head up to CNN.
Cary looks at her....I GUESS ITS GOING TO BE ONE Of THOSE DAYS.
YOU NEVER KNOW she says...THINGS CHANGE IN A NANOSECOND THESE DAYS... EVERY DAY IS LIKE LIVING IN A WILD SURREAL KALEIDOSCOPE. NOTHING SEEMS REAL ANYMORE.
Cary nods in agreement....YOU CAN SAY THAT AGAIN.
She takes a sip of her wine. Men are so demanding. EVERY DAY IS LIKE LIVING IN A WILD KALEIDESCOPE, she says again ....due to the request for repetition.
Several feet away she notices the big TV screen behind the bar. There's breaking news flashing across the screen.
"SMOKER TIP BRINGS HUGE RESULTS--- HIDDEN TREASURE FOUND AT DUTCH's PLACE -- HEBDO STILL AT LARGE -- CITY UNDER LOCKDOWN MARTIAL LAW."
Cruise hits the floor fully passed out.
The waitress returns...READY?
Cary puts the menu down..... WE'LL HAVE THE DAFFY DUCK SPECIAL- WELL DONE...COBB SALAD....AND WHAT THE HECK ARE POMME FRITES?
The waitress replies..... ROUND FRENCH FRIES
Cary's meal companion pipes up ...SOUNDS GREAT!!---- I LOVE FRENCH FRIES. I HAVE ALWAYS LOVED THEM. SINCE THEIR VERY INCEPTION.
A that moment a man hurries in who looks just like Leonardo DiCaprio. He greets the hostess saying ...HI--I HAVE A RESERVATION...NAME'S CHARLIE HEBDO.
Cary looks at his meal companion with candid sincerity and says....I HATE TO SOUND LIKE ONE OF THOSE TIN-FOIL HAT PEOPLE..... BUT DOES NOT THE WORLD SEEM TO BE GETTING RIDICULOUSLY MORE STRANGE AROUND US... EACH PASSING DAY?.... I WONDER WHEN THINGS ARE GOING TO GET BACK TO NORMAL.
She takes another sip of wine- and a deep breath.........................WHEN WE WAKE UP.